Mistaken ID — The Guide To Finding Yourself And The Right Career Choice.

Stress — we’re all too familiar with it. More of us than ever are feeling the relentless pressure of busy lives, professional uncertainty and it is taking its toll. In the US, stress related ailments cost the nation $300 billion every year in medical bills and lost productivity.

But it seems some people are able to cope with this problem much better than others. Some individuals are resilient, while others succumb to despair. Helpless, victim, not in control – these are definitely words that you’d rather not be associated with but may be how you’re feeling right now. There are 3 pretty subtle things that can keep you feeling helpless. Once you’re aware of them and you decide you’re ready to take back control in those areas, it will be absolutely life changing.

How do you feel when trouble approaches? Afraid? Uncertain? Helpless?

There are times when we need help from others. There are also times when help become crutches. Asking for help and consulting with your loved ones is an excellent way to grow quickly as a human. But if we get used to relying on them, their help can become crutches and get into our way of growth. When this happens, we miss out opportunities to think and act independently. And most unfortunately, we might also forget we are more capable than we think.

This realization was sparked off during a casual conversation with my girlfriend. Minutes before a Job interview in the Sales field. I’m currently working through an important transition. Perhaps my most important one. Working to understand the myth and reality of actually doing what I love — writing. Not sales or anything else. Truth is, lots of dream careers involve elements that aren’t fun — some even painful.

Let’s take it step by step. First, I had to understand that the anxiety that comes with it, actually helps us succeed, at least in small doses. Too much anxiety can be paralyzing and get in the way of doing what matters. A bit of anxiety, a bit of fear, reminds us that we are doing something important and we ought to be prepared.

If you’re unwilling to experience at least a little fear and anxiety, it will be very difficult for you to move toward what matters in your life. Comparatively, if you’re experiencing so much anxiety that you cannot perform, this too is a problem. Learning how to use your anxiety is a valuable tool in moving in a valued direction in your life.

Understand that anxiety is not your enemy. It is working to help you be prepared. Feeling nervous or anxious doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t do it. If you wait to start until you feel confident enough, you will never get started. We learn from trying and failing and trying again. Be willing to fail and grow from your mistakes. Yes, failing is painful, but the alternative of doing nothing is painful as well. Ask yourself what is worse: Trying and failing or never trying?

Breathe in and out, I exercised as I wrapped up the conversation with my girlfriend. If your dreams feel unobtainable, find the first step you can take. Even if you’re never able to fully actualize your dream, a life spent moving in a valued direction likely will feel much more rewarding than a life spent in procrastination.

When fears feel vague in your mind, when you lack clarity, then it’s easy to get lost in exaggerated worries and disaster scenarios. Find clarity in a worry-inducing situation by asking yourself honestly and realistically, what is the worst that could happen?

When I answered that question, I then followed it up with a bit of soul searching and time on figuring out what I can do about it. Finding clarity saved me a whole lot of time, energy and suffering.

Those few minutes in the car that were spent venting made a huge difference. So much so, that we drove away. I did not go into the Sales interview. Because it’s not what I want to do. After a while you actually start to think about what you were so worried about in the first place. Sometimes the other person may only have to listen as you work through the situation yourself out loud. At other times, it can be very helpful to let the other person ground you and help you find a more practical and useful perspective on the situation at hand. My girlfriend had changed my life — yet again.

There I found myself. A selfless writer that uses creativity to better illustrate his message. From the words chosen to the pictures painted through metaphor, the aim is to be vivid — a tricky blend of clear and imaginative. Imaginative in the sense that I will need to make use of everything that happens around me and use it as material. As I am doing now by sharing this story with you. Making use of Seinfeld’s question: “I’m never not working on material. Every second of my existence, I am thinking, ‘Can I do something with that?’

Yes. I can. Everyone can. Don’t carry around the wrong ID in your wallet for the rest of your life. Be the person that you were meant to be. The person that brings you happiness, excitement and charisma.

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