War On The Rocks.

Because Trump picking a fight with all of our allies isn’t enough… 

Ah, come on, you didn’t think we’d be starting of this piece bashing Obama’s foreign policy did you? I get it, the comparisons between the two need to come to an end. But lets face it. The Trump foreign policy doctrine has two steps. First, put a sack of cash on Donald Trump’s desk. Second, nope, actually thats pretty much it. Let this be characterized as intellectual laziness from an egomaniac who refuses to take advice.

From proposing a total U.S ban on luxury German cars, to spoiling for a fight with China on steel and aluminum. The same man who entered office promising to rip up trade deals and crack down on unfair trading practices, is clashing with trading partners on all sides. To the north, he’s battling Canada; to the south, Mexico; to the east, Europe; across the Pacific Ocean to the west, China and Japan. The orange menace is threatening to leave us without many other things. Without grapes, peanut butter, steel, aluminum. All while the poor get their housing and insurance taken away. We are now to be unequivocally ran like a Trump casino. On the flip side: It’s good to see this administration using trade tariffs to sanction against real hostile, abusive enemy foreign powers like… Canada?

Can we talk about this for a second? The president of the United States referenced the war of 1812 during a phone call about tariffs on Canada with Prime Minister Trudeau. That’s great because… Well because the war in 1812 wasn’t with Canada. Nor did they burn down the White House like Trump told Trudeau. That war was with the British. So how much longer do we have to be a national embarrassment thanks to this guy? This is nothing short of a catastrophe. Europe/Canada are raising prices on whiskey. Whiskey! That’s the ultimate dealbreaker for a Venezuelan/American like myself. Take my healthcare but not my whiskey! What a time! 

The most frustrating thing about the tariffs is that they pack a political punch: They’d hurt constituents of House Speaker Paul Ryan, a Wisconsin Republican, and Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, a Kentucky Republican. So it’s not like this guy is doing this to simply hurt liberals. He’s willing to hurt anyone that stands in his way. It’s not unusual to spot a cranky 3-year-old screaming on the dirty Target floor because their mom won’t let them buy their 50th stuffed animal. Trump may not end up on the ground in a big-box store very often, but he’s definitely known for going full-toddler in his frequent Twitter rants that take aim at everything from “Crooked Hillary” to the “lying” mainstream media. Imagine a giant, angry baby rolling around on the floor of a mansion with an Iphone in hand. That’s basically Trump these days.

So I say this in the nicest way possible. To my fellow Canadians, and everyone else who has been unfairly victimized,

We apologize on behalf of the USA. Please don’t pay attention to our incompetent President & his poor knowledge and lies. His history classes were from Trump University. Please be patient as we are working hard to fix this issue. 

Love, 

Your USA allies.

3 Comments

  1. The Trumpster Dumpster is the paper helper

    Liked by 2 people

  2. If his aponent is going to be all around social media and not only that but Trump fund’s his own campaign so it’s going to be a long day for you and I and a team effort to get rid of him

    Like

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